Pain… it is something all of us have known; a headache, a
prick of a needle, a tooth ache, or even a broken bone… These are temporary and
can be excruciating for a time. We can’t wait for time to pass, the wound to
heal and the pain to go away. When it does, we tend to take for granted the
time that is pain free, the time that falls between this pain and the next time
we step on a Lego or stub our toe in the dark. Chronic pain is something entirely different, and something a few
are burdened with day in and day out.
With chronic pain, there is never a break from the pain, only times when the
intensity of pain may vary. How do you go on day after day with the knowledge
that there is not going to be a break? How do you face tomorrow with hope
rather than being consumed with depression and hopelessness?
Ladd’s pain management doctor has frequently commented on
his positive attitude and his willingness to get out and work… on his eagerness
to be a productive member of society in spite of the great amount of pain he wrestles
with. He has commented over and over on patients with far less acute levels of
pain who pressure him for disability ratings vs patients like Ladd who seek to
manage their pain so they can function and use their abilities rather than be
secluded with their disabilities.
While there is no doubt that intense, ongoing pain can be
very disabling, what makes some people able to push forward through the pain
and continue to serve others in the process? Living alongside of one who has
done this for almost 12 years now, I have observed four character traits that
appear to be at the heart of living in hope despite pain.
1) Faith – Faith in God and knowledge that this world, with
its pain and disappointment, is only temporary… that Jesus overcame the pain of
the cross so that we would one day join Him in Heaven where there is forever no
pain. This is the long term view that has a positive long term outcome over a
focus on thoughts of 24/7/365 pain that can completely drag down and defeat. In
the short term, trust that God’s got things in his control and each day is a
new opportunity helps make the most of each day. (John 16:33 I
have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In
this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the
world. and John 14:2 In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so,
I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.)
2) Servant’s Heart – The
same desire to serve people, to help others in need, that makes a good police
officer remains even when that career is no longer possible. Serving others is
a heart desire, part of the character of a person, and serving others in need
takes focus off of our own needs and wants. (Galatians 6:9 Let us not become
weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a
harvest if we do not give up. and Proverbs 11:25 A generous person will prosper;
whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.)
3) Desire to be
Productive – Rather than focus on disabilities and what can no longer be done,
there are plenty of things that can be done. Shifting focus to abilities, and
off of disabilities, is encouraging and uplifting rather than depressing and
self-defeating (This isn't necessarily easy, but it is uplifting). Accomplishing things, even if they seem small compared to tasks
from before injury (ie: working 2 hours a day with kids instead of working full
time chasing criminals), and contributing to family and community is
self-fulfilling and gratifying… leading to hope for what can be accomplished
tomorrow. I am a firm believer that God will not call us to do something He
hasn’t perfectly equipped us to do.
4) Work Ethic – Life
before pain set in established patterns of working to provide for family and
self… not an attitude that anyone else should provide for or take care of us.
Dedication to completing the task, even when it’s hard, was a way of life long
before tragedy struck. While full time work or career may not be possible, a drive to try - to never give up - is grounded in a solid work ethic. Depending on the season, "work" may be physical therapy, rehab, school or training, etc. (Colossians 3:23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the
Lord, not for human masters, and 2 Corinthians 9:6 Remember this:
Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously
will also reap generously.)
These four character attributes all contribute greatly to the
ability to persevere in spite of incredible pain. Add to that the support and
love of family and friends, and you have a recipe for life that has hope in
spite of unrelenting pain.
Understanding that chronic pain is draining, and stress
compounded on exhaustion can weaken stamina as well as the immune system;
allowing for rest and taking care to eat healthy and exercise is especially
important for those suffering from chronic pain. There is a fine line between
pushing forward and getting necessary
rest. Everyone’s line is different. We all need to balance, and finding it is a
daily quest. Sometimes we miss, and fall off the horse. Faith helps refocus so
we can get back on and try again… and again. Keep getting back on. No matter
how hard the day, there is a sunset on the horizon to ride off into, and I want
to ride into it together!
