This
is an awkward topic, but one that I have wrestled with frequently over the
course of the last decade. It seems to be one that others have wrestled with as
well, so I'm going out on a limb and writing about it. I do not mean to offend
anyone. I only want to put it out there for thought, discussion and prayer...
please know that my heart is with those who also wrestle with this issue...
from either side of the issue, as I believe there is no clear answer this side
of heaven... just perhaps different ways to look at a story that only a
sovereign God who knows the entire story can possibly know.
We have found ourselves in hospitals, particularly ICU rooms, on numerous occasions throughout the last 10.5 years. During the course of these stays, our family has been blessed with some pretty incredible miracles. We have also sat in waiting rooms with amazing families who have lost a loved one at the very time when our loved one made a miraculous recovery. How do you cry with one family, yet rejoice for your own at the same time? How do you not feel burdened with guilt while bubbling over with excitement?
These questions have weighed heavy on my heart and bounced around in my head so often. I have prayed over them and desperately sought reason. The thing I keep coming back to is that God knows... and I can't possibly know, because I don't have the big picture.
Two truths give insight into this big picture though...
1) None of us are here forever, and we are all here for a time... some a long time, others a short time. We each have a calling and a purpose, and we will all eventually spend eternity in heaven or hell based on where we choose to put our faith here in this life. It is up to us to choose eternity in heaven with Jesus by accepting his loving gift of salvation through his death and resurrection; or to reject him, and reject heaven.
2) This world is full of sin, and bad things happen every day. We can cling to hope in spite of this, or we can get mired down in despair because of this.
With these truths in mind, and after seeing much suffering in those who have overcome one bad thing or another, I wonder... could it be possible that sometimes the miracle is in fact not that a person lives in spite of the odds, but that the person is carried home to rest with the Father instead of continuing to struggle on here on earth? Is it perhaps just as much a miracle that a good and faithful servant is allowed to move on to heaven as when they are restored to health? Is letting go sometimes the very miracle that we seek?
Since miracles are God's department, and there is nothing that is not in his control, who am I to say one miracle is better or more fitting than another, let alone define what is a miracle?
For the time at hand, I will take comfort in what I know, for I know that there is far more that I do not know or understand. I know that my days are numbered. I know that should today bring the need for a miracle, I'm leaving it up to God to know just what miracle I am in need of. I know, that should my miracle be that it is finally my time to move on to heaven, I'm ready. I know that God will take care of those left behind with miracles custom made for them... in the right place, at the right time, and for the right purpose.
We have found ourselves in hospitals, particularly ICU rooms, on numerous occasions throughout the last 10.5 years. During the course of these stays, our family has been blessed with some pretty incredible miracles. We have also sat in waiting rooms with amazing families who have lost a loved one at the very time when our loved one made a miraculous recovery. How do you cry with one family, yet rejoice for your own at the same time? How do you not feel burdened with guilt while bubbling over with excitement?
These questions have weighed heavy on my heart and bounced around in my head so often. I have prayed over them and desperately sought reason. The thing I keep coming back to is that God knows... and I can't possibly know, because I don't have the big picture.
Two truths give insight into this big picture though...
1) None of us are here forever, and we are all here for a time... some a long time, others a short time. We each have a calling and a purpose, and we will all eventually spend eternity in heaven or hell based on where we choose to put our faith here in this life. It is up to us to choose eternity in heaven with Jesus by accepting his loving gift of salvation through his death and resurrection; or to reject him, and reject heaven.
2) This world is full of sin, and bad things happen every day. We can cling to hope in spite of this, or we can get mired down in despair because of this.
With these truths in mind, and after seeing much suffering in those who have overcome one bad thing or another, I wonder... could it be possible that sometimes the miracle is in fact not that a person lives in spite of the odds, but that the person is carried home to rest with the Father instead of continuing to struggle on here on earth? Is it perhaps just as much a miracle that a good and faithful servant is allowed to move on to heaven as when they are restored to health? Is letting go sometimes the very miracle that we seek?
Since miracles are God's department, and there is nothing that is not in his control, who am I to say one miracle is better or more fitting than another, let alone define what is a miracle?
For the time at hand, I will take comfort in what I know, for I know that there is far more that I do not know or understand. I know that my days are numbered. I know that should today bring the need for a miracle, I'm leaving it up to God to know just what miracle I am in need of. I know, that should my miracle be that it is finally my time to move on to heaven, I'm ready. I know that God will take care of those left behind with miracles custom made for them... in the right place, at the right time, and for the right purpose.
